has been a few days, catching completely unaware, I began to feel for first time towards babies as I have always felt for the dogs: a mixture of empathy and instinct for protection. Something completely new to me, because generally I like children for a period not exceeding a quarter of an hour.
beginning to have hope that change, that would not have to feel so I admit guilt any time I call out my absolute preference for dogs. And, more importantly, it cleared my doubts about my attitude toward my own unborn child, as my head round the possibility (and fear) that my maternal instinct is not manifested before.
Well, we have had to spend an afternoon by a 6 year old boy and his sister, a baby of one year, so my fears back to the load. The boy, who has autism with mild mental retardation has not received a minimum discipline by their parents, who live virtually blind eye to it, and have never lifted a finger to try to improve their status or learn more about it. Thus, it is becoming aggressive towards others (including his sister), and it destroys all you have at your fingertips.
I'm not the best person to care for their children, but circumstances forced me to it. And there came a time when I needed very little to choose between running away through the door, give a good pair of spanking the child to mourn or give me directly.
If in three or four hours not only have not been able to handle the situation without stress, but have enough to declare the new "anti-children", what kind of mother will I be when I get my turn?
